Do you regret something?

[~SnowAngel~]

Just wondering why some people would regret something, while others who did the same wouldn't regret it.
Like for ex, if you went to jail for X years for upload/downloading something, would you regret everything related to that? orrr there was just one thing you said to someone, and wish you could take it back. or Wish you made a different impression on other people and kept in line with who you wanted to be. Regret can be powerful either in a good or bad way, we might not even think about what we regret or just not acting on it. Even if we can't go to the source, we could still act on a new resolve, and be that example instead.

sooo for this topic, think of something you regret and what you can do for the better~ or think of something you probably should regret and how changing that could be important to your would-be life :3
Another interesting thing to think about is to wonder why some people don't regret something that others would. What do you think makes them different? Is there a special way to heal from regrets, or something like that?

 

[Hinode]

sooo for this topic, think of something you regret and what you can do for the better~ or think of something you probably should regret and how changing that could be important to your would-be life :3

The thing I regret the most is that I was too nice when I was younger. People could tell me to do stuff and I did it since I thought that it was nice of me to help them. I couldn't understand that they only used me to do their work because I only could see the good things in people. I believe that's why I ended up getting bullied as well. I was too nice so I couldn't tell them to stop. I thought it was rude to try and stop what they wanted to do. It ruined my social life since I can't trust people anymore. I ended up going from seeing everything good in people to only seeing the bad things in people.

I believe that the bullies wouldn't have prioritized me as their target if I would've been a bit more rough instead of being nice to everyone. So I would say that I would've been better at social things if I wouldn't have been so nice to people. I was shy at that time, but I could still talk to people. Now I prefer to keep myself away from others to avoid the risk of it repeating itself.

Is there a special way to heal from regrets, or something like that?

Currently I have some people that's helping me with social things, both from far away and in my "school" or what I should call it. I'm getting more used to talking with the people in my "school" and I'm beginning to realize that they don't want to hurt me. So I suppose that it's going a bit forward with that. People have tried to talk with me about it but I'm keeping alot of it inside of me. It feels that I'll just be a bother to those that I actually tell these things to.

MVH Hinode.

 

[~SnowAngel~]

Spoiler

The thing I regret the most is that I was too nice when I was younger. People could tell me to do stuff and I did it since I thought that it was nice of me to help them. I couldn't understand that they only used me to do their work because I only could see the good things in people. I believe that's why I ended up getting bullied as well. I was too nice so I couldn't tell them to stop. I thought it was rude to try and stop what they wanted to do. It ruined my social life since I can't trust people anymore. I ended up going from seeing everything good in people to only seeing the bad things in people.

I believe that the bullies wouldn't have prioritized me as their target if I would've been a bit more rough instead of being nice to everyone. So I would say that I would've been better at social things if I wouldn't have been so nice to people. I was shy at that time, but I could still talk to people. Now I prefer to keep myself away from others to avoid the risk of it repeating itself.



Currently I have some people that's helping me with social things, both from far away and in my "school" or what I should call it. I'm getting more used to talking with the people in my "school" and I'm beginning to realize that they don't want to hurt me. So I suppose that it's going a bit forward with that. People have tried to talk with me about it but I'm keeping alot of it inside of me. It feels that I'll just be a bother to those that I actually tell these things to.

MVH Hinode.

I was about the same~ I helped because I enjoyed helping people, but even still there isn't anything wrong with that :o
I know I was being taken advantage of sometimes (mostly being gullable lol). The more I went through that willingly, the better I was at discerning genuine help vs something not nice. I don't think there's a thing as being too nice. I mean, there's enough mean ppl in the world already x-x. If anything, other people can be mean for you since you were nice to them XD that's one thing I learned~
Some people that used to be that way to me I've met years later, and they were overwhelmed with me just releasing them of everything. I mean, it's like a funny story we tell other people now, at least how we tell it XD I had now idea what they went through at the time, so I can honestly say that they had it better than I did x-x

From experiences like that, I made this lock on myself and kept seeking attention from ppl to be that source of healing. I eventually went through a phase of jealousy and bitterness, even to some close friends. I think the one eye-opener for me was when I behaved like the ppl I wanted to avoid, which afterwards I learned through a friend's book about forgiveness. (they used a weird guy who kept dirty diapers as an example XD). It was meant for guys, but it really applied to me.
Soo even after "forgiving" people, I still had to deal with my behavior (mostly pessimistic thinking). I looked for different ways to be positive, and tried some meditative thing that was probably more like a way to "change my programming" as they put it :o
Soo after all that, I was at least free from all the drama XD but had the lock still, which I pretty much had to swim where I was afraid to make it break some :o now there's a tiny piece I'm going to try with a Splankna person since it sounds so interesting XD

 

[Ghost Kitty~]

Hmm... regret?... I suppose theres tons to regret... not that most is that important... Like how i didnt do the best i could in school? Messed with friends too much... Though i guess i dont actually regret it that much? I dont have many i could call close friends irl or even friends... so i try to keep the few i make... and internet is about the only way i even communicate with them now anyhow... would like to actually meet them since it helps strengthen bonds more than chatting online... or at least allows for different bonds to be strengthened anyway... Im... not great at making friends anyway... I dont mind friends using me since it makes me happy to see them happy... They never really went that extreme anyway... and the ones that did arent really friends anymore... I always viewed myself as more of a servant than anything else... even if i get the role of leader... though i guess my sadistic side comes out sometimes if i do become leader ;p Love wise i have nothing to regret since ill never be able to convince myself to ask... My current excuse being that i need to finish school first...

 

[FinalPyre]

Things we regret huh? I don't tend to hold regrets for very long, but some things will keep coming back to me for a while to haunt me where I realized I made a bad choice (though often they are really little things so I'm not sure why), or things where I wish I was better at sorting out my words in a good way to get the point across. I think I have failed some places pretty hard where if I was better at quickly organizing my thoughts and information I would have been able to make a good teaching experience out of a disaster/time I had to back down.

I suppose if I was to be completely honest I kind of regret that I have become the kind of person who loves to come to sites like this and read everything rather than the kind of person who likes to practice their skills. I've talked to so many people who just plain love to draw or love to play an instrument or something else, and I just always feel like I could have become one of those people but some bad decisions (some but not all mine) led me not too, and now I don't enjoy those things quite as much as I might have otherwise.

I try to be pretty forward-thinking though, and for what it is I am enjoying my life right now for the most part. :)

 

[FAMAS]

The thing I regret the most is that I was too nice when I was younger. People could tell me to do stuff and I did it since I thought that it was nice of me to help them. I couldn't understand that they only used me to do their work because I only could see the good things in people. I believe that's why I ended up getting bullied as well. I was too nice so I couldn't tell them to stop. I thought it was rude to try and stop what they wanted to do. It ruined my social life since I can't trust people anymore. I ended up going from seeing everything good in people to only seeing the bad things in people.

I believe that the bullies wouldn't have prioritized me as their target if I would've been a bit more rough instead of being nice to everyone. So I would say that I would've been better at social things if I wouldn't have been so nice to people. I was shy at that time, but I could still talk to people. Now I prefer to keep myself away from others to avoid the risk of it repeating itself.



Currently I have some people that's helping me with social things, both from far away and in my "school" or what I should call it. I'm getting more used to talking with the people in my "school" and I'm beginning to realize that they don't want to hurt me. So I suppose that it's going a bit forward with that. People have tried to talk with me about it but I'm keeping alot of it inside of me. It feels that I'll just be a bother to those that I actually tell these things to.

MVH Hinode.

You can still be "nice" to others if that's of your nature. Some would identify that as a "good quality" and in a time of need, allies may be more willing to come to your aid. (There are other reasons as well.)
For that specific problem (of being taken advantage of), I think you'd need assertiveness and personal boundaries. Basically the ability for when/to say "no". For example: No Billy! I will NOT let you touch me there! Of course, that’s easier said than done but nonetheless.
Not very helpful but just thoughts.

 

[Lord Zero]

The thing I regret the most is that I was too nice when I was younger. People could tell me to do stuff and I did it since I thought that it was nice of me to help them. I couldn't understand that they only used me to do their work because I only could see the good things in people. I believe that's why I ended up getting bullied as well. I was too nice so I couldn't tell them to stop. I thought it was rude to try and stop what they wanted to do. It ruined my social life since I can't trust people anymore. I ended up going from seeing everything good in people to only seeing the bad things in people.

I believe that the bullies wouldn't have prioritized me as their target if I would've been a bit more rough instead of being nice to everyone. So I would say that I would've been better at social things if I wouldn't have been so nice to people. I was shy at that time, but I could still talk to people. Now I prefer to keep myself away from others to avoid the risk of it repeating itself.



Currently I have some people that's helping me with social things, both from far away and in my "school" or what I should call it. I'm getting more used to talking with the people in my "school" and I'm beginning to realize that they don't want to hurt me. So I suppose that it's going a bit forward with that. People have tried to talk with me about it but I'm keeping alot of it inside of me. It feels that I'll just be a bother to those that I actually tell these things to.

MVH Hinode.

For some reason it makes me remember this guy and how he cant help but to help others just because.

Then again, real life is not so rosy and many assholes will see gentleness as weakness and a target to exploit. Sigh.

 

[Karlotto]

I regret alotta things, but only for a short time. If I do something wrong it`ll tug on me for a few days but eventually it goes away. Not sure why that is, but I assume it`s some sort of lack of empathy as I never regret things that people don`t know I did, only things they do know I did and/or things that affect them directly, as those things can then affect me in a negative way. Selfishness I suppose? I don`t hesitate to do bad actions unless I feel they might come back to bite me. Not sure what to call it.

So I suppose I should regret not having a sense of regret. Don`t get me wrong, I know what is right and what isn`t, I just don`t mind it when I do something others would consider "bad". (and no, I don`t do bad things all the time. I`m not evil. )
If I could change that I suppose it would make me a better person. I can`t really come up with much of an answer for this thread`s main question as I don`t really "regret" things per se.

As for why some people regret things while others don`t, I`d say it can be dependent on either how empathetic that person is or their personal views on things. For example, a person with no empathy or remorse for their actions wouldn`t feel the slightest bit bad about harming an innocent person. Now say you have a normal person that considers such a thing wrong, they could hold the view that the person they`re hurting deserves it, or perhaps they could feel that it was a necessary action.

Or for a much less extreme example (as that one was more of an example for remorse rather than regret.) say you have two people. One holds the view that stealing is wrong no matter the circumstances while the other says that stealing is wrong but he believes that the price for what he wants is also wrong, or that the money is going to someone who doesn`t deserve it. The first would regret stealing the item, the second not. It depends on the persons mindset.

Sorry, I realize this is one of my weaker responses. I`m just not good at expressing my views on these sort of concepts, I just feel oddly compelled to respond regardless.

 

[Lord Zero]

I regret alotta things, but only for a short time. If I do something wrong it`ll tug on me for a few days but eventually it goes away. Not sure why that is, but I assume it`s some sort of lack of empathy as I never regret things that people don`t know I did, only things they do know I did and/or things that affect them directly, as those things can then affect me in a negative way. Selfishness I suppose? I don`t hesitate to do bad actions unless I feel they might come back to bite me. Not sure what to call it.

So I suppose I should regret not having a sense of regret. Don`t get me wrong, I know what is right and what isn`t, I just don`t mind it when I do something others would consider "bad". (and no, I don`t do bad things all the time. I`m not evil. )
If I could change that I suppose it would make me a better person. I can`t really come up with much of an answer for this thread`s main question as I don`t really "regret" things per se.

As for why some people regret things while others don`t, I`d say it can be dependent on either how empathetic that person is or their personal views on things. For example, a person with no empathy or remorse for their actions wouldn`t feel the slightest bit bad about harming an innocent person. Now say you have a normal person that considers such a thing wrong, they could hold the view that the person they`re hurting deserves it, or perhaps they could feel that it was a necessary action.

Or for a much less extreme example (as that one was more of an example for remorse rather than regret.) say you have two people. One holds the view that stealing is wrong no matter the circumstances while the other says that stealing is wrong but he believes that the price for what he wants is also wrong, or that the money is going to someone who doesn`t deserve it. The first would regret stealing the item, the second not. It depends on the persons mindset.

Sorry, I realize this is one of my weaker responses. I`m just not good at expressing my views on these sort of concepts, I just feel oddly compelled to respond regardless.

Detachment ? I think that many of us feel that way about things.

Then again, i must say that i dont regret doing things. If i took a decision thats it. Like picking a route in a visual novel. You are unaware of the consequences of seemingly trivial decisions all the time, so there is no helping it. You cant waste time feeling down for things that are already part of the past. Its useless, pitiful.

What i regret is letting things go in the sense of not acting when i should had. Typical example its not buying something
when i could do it. Most of the times i find something interesting to buy, it happens that is gone next time
im there. Or worst, there have been times when the entire store has closed by the time i remember checking it.

 

[Karlotto]

^ This. I forgot to talk about regret of non-action. That does bug me sometimes. Knowing I could`ve done something and didn`t is pretty annoying. Damn hindsight.

On a side note, is your sig quote from anything Zero? Google searches return nothing but it sounds damn familiar.

EDIT: I remembered, It`s Fallout. How did "The Enclave" not tip me off?

 

[Lord Zero]

^ This. I forgot to talk about regret of non-action. That does bug me sometimes. Knowing I could`ve done something and didn`t is pretty annoying. Damn hindsight.

On a side note, is your sig quote from anything Zero? Google searches return nothing but it sounds damn familiar.

EDIT: I remembered, It`s Fallout. How did "The Enclave" not tip me off?

John Henry Eden makes me smile. He does want to erradicate everyone, but his speeches are awesome.

Regarding regret... it happens that im kind of slow on the uptake... so while i would love to ill never be
a deadpan snarker with a seemly endless supply of clever remarks.

Im witty enough to come up with interesting things to say, but im the spur of the moment i tend to look rather
dull and unspired.

So the whole "damn, i should have said THIS or THAT" its a permanent thing for me.

Sometimes i think on something fun to say and then carry the conversation in that direction in order to deliver my line. Otherwise its impossible.

 

[musangbeku]

I regret that I'm too hasty about relationship in my high school x_x

 

[Mаru]

I regret that I'm too hasty about relationship in my high school x_x

I'm not sure that i right understand you
Did you mean fast and short relationships with girlfriends/boyfriends?

 

[musangbeku]

I'm not sure that i right understand you
Did you mean fast and short relationships with girlfriends/boyfriends?

I mean I'm too hasty to pick someone as my gf and not thinking about the consequences later

 

[Infamous]

the only thing i regret is being shy & being afraid of rejection when i was younger. it has caused me a lot of "coulda, shoulda" thoughts

 

[Uηitice]

A good friend of mine once said to me "there is no such thing as regret, only lessons to be learned". Ever since then I've engraved those words into my soul and lived by them. Better to avoid dwelling on the "could've done this, should've done that" feelings and focus on what you would do better if a situation like that arises again.

 

[Yee199]

I regret not leaving some space for the Pho after eating alot on Thanksgiving :P

 

[Gigatron]

I regret everything!

 

[Lord Zero]

I regret leaving my swords behind at home... and by home i mean 14.000 kilometers away.

 

[Dark Angel]

i don't regret for nothing That's the way i am!

 

[Rucking Fetard]

^what if you destroyed your expensive computer on a fit of rage?

Me... hmm... I usually don't care about things so...

 

[Dark Angel]

mine one i don't care burn it hell

my hard disks is the important to me...

 

[Rucking Fetard]

Okay.. this is just a SIMULATION, it probably won't happen in real life

what if you destroyed all your hard disks on a fit of rage? (it means you are angry & you unconsciously destroyed it)

 

[Dark Angel]

there is always the PLAN B!!!! B -> Backup ;)

 

[Rucking Fetard]

Oh yeah...

again this is just a simulation..

let's just say you destroyed your whole house (internally) on a fit of rage, would you regret it?