[Entries] WOW #3 - May 2016

[Ignis]

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Another round of Weavers of Words under my care! Hey, at least KK is going back soon, so you all will be spared from my ramblings shortly enough. In the meantime, you get to enjoy all the melodious symphony borne out of the love I make with my keyboard. Forsooth, populace, I implore thee to savour it while it lasts. I mean, it's kinda related to this month's theme, too.

We're accepting both poems and short stories for this round. Prose may be more suitable for those with more leisure as it can take quite some time to plan, write, and proofread. Poetry may cater more to the adventurous as it can take a higher level of challenge to compose and construct. By allowing both, we hope to see more participants and more diversity without alienating anyone who leans more to either side.

As usual, all participants will get this award...

...but the winner will get this!

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I suppose it's more appropriate to call these "criteria", but referring to them as "rules" may help ensure that people pay attention to them. At least, I hope so. Anyway, the rules for WOW are pretty simple:

1. Your entry can be EITHER a short story OR a poem.
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2. For short stories: Minimum 500 words. Maximum 1500 words.
   For poems: Minimum 4 lines. Maximum 40 lines. (Line breaks don't count.)
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3. No racism, religious topics, overly obscene depictions, animal/child abuse or other inflammatory topics.
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4. You can pick any title you like for your entry as long as it conforms with #3.
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5. Please post your finished entry wrapped within spoilers in this thread.

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The theme for this month's Weavers of Words shall be...

TAKE NOTHING FOR GRANTED.​

"Reflect upon your present blessings―of which every man has many―not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some."
―Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol and Other Christmas Writings

Don't you think life is beautiful? I mean, sure, it sucks and it has a lot of problems you wish would just go away. But, if you can complain, that means you're alive, right? You're alive and able to complain, which is more than can be said for those from whom the ability to complain has been taken away.

Your classmates are good-for-nothing arseholes and your curricula teach you nothing useful? At least you're financially capable enough to afford school, or lucky enough to live somewhere that guarantees free-of-charge education, or were fortunate enough to earn a scholarship. That degree is likely going to be at least mildly helpful in the future, too. That's more than can be said for those not well-off enough to afford school, nor live somewhere that guarantees it, nor earn a scholarship.

You have lazy colleagues at work and your boss always gives you more workload than you're capable of doing despite paying you a modest salary? At least you have a job. Plus, all that time you've spent working for that slave-driver employer will at least add to your curriculum vitae and may enable you to seek for better employment in the future. That's more than can be said for those unable to get employed not through their own laziness.

Your parents try to control every aspect of your life? At least... yeah, you know the rest.

Anyway, to clarify:

The theme for WOW #3 is BLESSINGS.
Savour every moment, for what you take for granted could be someone else's lifetime desire.​

This theme shouldn't be taken to mean "blessings" in the religious sense. It has nothing to do with religiosity and everything with having a general appreciative feeling for whatever you have so that you can make wine when life gives you sour grapes. I'm not sure that's the correct proverb, but whatever. By the way, don't drink if you're underage, mmkay? But I digress. While this theme may sound all positive and motivational, so did last round's theme of "wish", yet we had a handful of dark-themed entries. Let's see how far your imaginative talents can take you. Best of luck to all participants!

Theme inspired by none other than [MENTION=93850]|♚| KK |♚|[/MENTION], the official proprietor of this contest.

The deadline is on 31 MAY 2016.
You MAY edit your entry submission post as many times as you please before the deadline.​

Please submit your entry before the deadline. If you're unsure about certain aspects of your draft entry, feel free to ask around in the discussion thread. You can have only ONE post in the entry submission thread, but you're not restricted from discussing the WOW as much as you want in the discussion thread. The deadline may be extended on our discretion if circumstances necessitate it, but it won't be shortened for no reason, so rest assured and don't rush. Take your time to make a masterpiece!

This thread is only for ENTRIES!
For discussions, questions and comments, please go to this thread instead.​

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[8Laelia8]

I don't really know if I'm doing this right haha it's my first time doing anything like it so I'm very sorry if I did something wrong T_T Here goes :3 (can't figure out how to properly use the spoiler thingy btw, it kept just disappearing on me...

Spoiler

-Precious Connections-

She's holding her head surrounded by death,
War all around her she takes her last breath.
With tears in her eyes and a smile on her face,
She's fading away to a peaceful embrace.
The grinning of her parents hones into view,
Together again because their love is true.
Transcending death, space and all time,
This family's hearts are one and divine.

Far away another girl whispers,
Staring blankly whilst stroking his whiskers.
Her peaceful life with a cat for a friend,
Is inching closer to it's end.
Her family had abandoned her long ago,
Her longing for companionship led her to Snow.
They snuggled together as she went to sleep,
Their memories together he'll always keep.

In death we are nothing, in life we can choose,
To live to the fullest or give in to the blues.
If you've got just one thing of which you hold dear,
That's reason enough to laugh and to cheer.
When you're down and alone just remember one thing,
It could be much worse so smile and sing!
Don't waste your life on fears and rejection,
Focus your strength on your precious connections!!

-Fin-
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[ancer_nyaa]

Spoiler: This Golden Sea

Bright golden sea,
As far as my eyes could see.
The emptiness of my heart,
Can not be filled with a golden cart.

Their heartwarming hugs
Can not be replaced with expensive jugs.
I was a fool,
To replace them with golden tools.

While I stare at this golden sea,
On this cold golden seat.
As I started to get old.
I realized that leaving them was not worth the sea of gold

Repeatition is catchy~~~
Sorry for stretching this one thin.
Still thinking how to change the last line

 

[Leggy]

As someone once said, "It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all."

This poem is for someone I loved and lost. Even today, I still feel truly blessed to have known her. She showed me that life is good!

Spoiler

My Lovely Angel


Lovely Lady, every move that you make,
Is so graceful and divine.
All the joy and charms, with you in my arms,
Is a pleasure, all the time.
Lovely Angel, when you fly in the air,
I can almost see your wings.
As you lightly touch down, upon the ground,
How it makes me want to sing.

Lovely Lady, the rhythm that moves you,
Brings a passion full of fire.
The looks that you look, sets my blood to cook,
A demoness, pure desire.
Lovely Angel, how you gracefully glide
Through the darkness and the light,
As you sway your hips, and you purse your lips,
You’re my goddess, sheer delight.

Lovely Lady, I’m forever grateful,
For all that your presence brings.
When you move, each night, an exquisite sight,
You’re the vision of my dreams.
Lovely Angel, thanks to Heaven above,
For sending you down to Earth.
And I must confess, that I’m truly blessed,
You’re a treasure beyond all worth.

 

[Ghost Kitty~]

Wah @_@ Almost forgot... Guess I tossed proper sentence structure out the window for this...

Spoiler: Journey to the Golden Land

Muffled steps within the distorted darkness. I tread a new path where thousands had gone before. Small lights scatter throughout the clearing, their glow as that of the stars within the night sky. They weave to and fro, dancing with the gusts of wind. Whispers call to those around as pleas, as wishes, as silly bits and pieces. Voices mingle and meaning fades, as it all recedes to the back of my mind.

I push on through this world unseen, hoping for a better land. A place away from this endless darkness where I may finally find a place to stay. For now, these lights serve for my reminiscence. Pieces from that radiant land, carried with the flow. Some settle gently on my palm, a warmth with differs with each. A few follow as I travel on, their glow brightening to push away the engulfing darkness. They guide me when I lose my way and slowly draw the darkness from within me. In return, through my cautious steps and stumbles, I try to do the same for them. To share this newfound joy of mine, this shelter within the murky dark.

Step by step, I draw closer to the mythical land. The spring from which flows all imagination. It was a place where creatures of lore dwelt and legends burst from their pages. A place most had long forgotten. But the few voices which urge me on, tell of their own fantastical tales. Their words bring out a familiar light, from deep within my soul. The lights mingle and each builds upon the ones before. My glow has since become a concoction from all their own, even the ones only touched in passing. Sadly some of those who accompanied have since disappeared, leaving only a yearning to see them once more. A desire to reciprocate the kindness that they had shown long ago. Yet, the accursed darkness had consumed the path. There is no turning back for me.

I can already see it just over the horizon, the glimmer greater than any other. I take a deep breath and close my eyes, imagining the land of fantasy as they had told. Their vibrant strokes revealed the painting, showing me details I had not seen before. Every dash layers upon those already set, blending to create a world sublime. A beautiful light shines throughout, with the fragrance of lilies floating on the wind. Lush flora sprout up around, leaving me within a sheltered grove. The lullaby of the heavens accompanies the streaks of light dancing on the forest floor. I find a sturdy branch to rest upon, to watch the clouds pass by. The sky transitions through the shades of dawn to dusk, with a crown of stars forming as the night drew near. It all looked so familiar, but something was not quite right.

The thoughts bleed into the darkness around, bringing a splash of crimson into the world. An unnatural distortion which stained the sky. It follows as I run for the light on the horizon, bathing the land in its sinister aura. A faint globe rises as I approach, considerably dimmer than I had imagined. The golden shine that filled the sky had taken a gloomy tint, inspiring a feeling of dread. Yet I trudge on toward the wonderland, to determine its state for myself.

I walk past bare trees and withered flowers, slowly matching the pieces with that of my dreams. There is an eerie silence which amplifies the crunch of dried leaves under my feet. The air is still beyond what dust stirs from my passing. This forgotten fantasy slowly shrinks as the darkness encroaches. I wearily slump at the base of a tree, reluctant to acknowledge my crumbling world. Ignoring as even the tree gives way to ashes. I lay motionless as the relentless darkness sets in once more. How long I had rested? I cannot say.

I woke to a familiar warmth upon my cheek, with gentle whispers in my ear. They call out to me, asking for my return. I slowly open an eye before quickly shutting it again. Hundreds had gathered around, the lights flickering to reflect their changes in mood. Their combined glows were almost blindingly bright, but as I stirred, their frantic flares slowly calmed to a dimmer flame. Yet, in that moment I had seen a glow brighter than even the golden light upon the horizon. I unsteadily push myself up again, lifted by their warmth. Within my mind I debate my path, before turning away from that land I had once sought. I step back into the darkness with these lights guiding my way.

 

[Ignis]

Last-minute entry! \o/ 36 lines after discounting line breaks.
Should've probably made this a short story instead... don't think I'd have the time to properly furnish a short story before the deadline, though...
Also, it's purposely a bit vague. It'd be quite out of character for me to explain a poem I wrote, but if anyone needs clarification like how it fits the theme, etc, feel free to ask.

Spoiler

Lachesis' Whims

Far up in the north,
ruled a king, wise and powerful;
everyone praised his worth,
except his daughter, who was hateful.

Princess Sophia hated her father, the King,
for his duties kept him from his daughter doting.
Sophia had only her toys to play with;
one of them, a talking doll, as if straight out of a myth.

Mi-sha, it proclaimed its name.
The princess' favour did the doll attain in no time,
as hateful little Sophia sighed such:
"If only I had power much so those I loathe I could clutch."

'Twas a new daybreak, as Sophia woke up from her slumber:
the palace was in chaos, cries blaring like thunder―
the King had passed; no longer was his wisdom to be seen;
and thus was little Sophia crowned queen.

"How fares my kingdom today?" asked the young queen;
"Everything is rosy, Majesty," answered her underling.
Alas, Sophia was blind: her people were suffering,
but, of the world beyond the walls, she knew nothing.

The peasants could take only so much agony.
The palace walls were tall and mighty,
but the people's anger, they failed to drown:
in a mere hour, lo and behold!―they were all torn down.

The palace knights were overwhelmed;
the Queen's servants had all but fled;
Sophia could only flee to her room,
where she saw Misha with a face of gloom.

The Queen fell to her knees and begged,
for the life she had back before she was crowned.
She then watched in awe as the palace crumbled,
and everyone but herself was mercilessly crushed.

Sophia was enclosed in debris, safe and sound―
Misha, her dear and only friend, lying on the ground.
The space was closed: air was thus limited;
Sophia, nonetheless, savoured every second that remained.

 

[|♚|KK|♚|]

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The task of sorting the entries in order of preference proved to be anything but trivial. All six entries had their own style and approach, each differing from the others, necessitating a careful read to grasp all the nuances. Tastes will always differ and a consensus in what constitutes 'good' writing may only be as widely accepted as the influence of the group of people agreeing on said consensus. Accordingly, mine isn't an assessment devoid of sways and biases. Still, a winner must be chosen; a list of preferred entries I shall write. Even though I'm going to try to put it simple and short.

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・・・Entry of [MENTION=125499]8Laelia8[/MENTION];

Why I chose this as the winning entry

Hello and thanks for participating in WOW, to be honest choosing your entry as the winner was a bit difficult by the sudden two new entry at the end of the month. It was really a difficult decision, but I feel this is the right choice for this round. Now as for your entry, it was really well written, it gave that feeling glad for something truly. Thanks again for participating, I'm looking forward to read more of your beautiful poems! I'm trying to keep this whole judging system short because I don't want to write long and bore people haha. Hope you had fun!

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・・・Entry of [MENTION=8332]samyeung46[/MENTION];

Why I chose this as the runner-up

Thanks again for participating in WOW! I was so happy to see that you entered this round, it was a interesting story but I felt it was lacking a spark of the main theme. Your stories are always so imaginative and lovely to read, I had so much fun while imagining the whole plot and the main character's feelings. I wonder how would it be if you'd write an entry as a poem rather than writing a story, maybe it could have been better for this round, who knows I guess. I really love your style of writing and hope I can read more from you. This is my point of view but I'm not saying it was a bad story, thanks again for participating! I'm looking forward from you.

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・・・Entry of [MENTION=2]Ignis[/MENTION];
Thanks again for participating this round of WOW, actually your entry made me bit confused at first but I read it a couple of times later on and finally felt the theme between the lines. Your writing style always seems organized which makes the story/poem interesting to read. But this round, I couldn't choose this entry as a second or first. Maybe a story could have been better for your plot, I'm not really sure but I wanted to feel more affection from the poem and I couldn't. Love to see more of your stories and poems again, hope you enoyed this round!

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・・・Entry of [MENTION=35259]Leggy[/MENTION];
Hello and thank you so much for participating in WOW for the first time! I hope to see you more in this contest, your entry was actually really good and lovely. It surprised me a lot when I kept reading and reading, the ending was beautiful and made me felt the theme for this round. But it wasn't enough for the rest poem, I hope I don't sound bad while judging but my point of view is a must to feel the theme so if I can't see it completely I feel a lack and the entry seems not enough. Like every entry, your poem was very well written and interesting to read, I found it beautiful and hope to see more from you next time.

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・・・Entry of [MENTION=65000]ancer_nyaa[/MENTION];

Why this didn't earn a higher position

Hello again, and thank you so much for participating again in this round of WOW! I loved reading your stories, and now the list got bigger when you wrote a poem for an entry. It was really catchy, and I loved reading it. But there was a problem with the most important thing, the theme! I really couldn't see any meaning about blessing on your entry. But without thinking any blessing theme it's a great poem, and makes me want to read it again. It was very fun reading the catchy lines, I hope to read more of your stories and poems.

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