The Wrong Answers to the World's Questions.

[srebro]

They're too busy on their phones that they've forgotten how to speak when in the company of others.

Why is your heart on your left side and not on the right side or in the middle.

 

[Leggy]

Time Lords have two hearts, one on the left and one on the right.
Heck, at first, the Tin Woodsman didn't even have a heart!


How many pockets should a pair of pants have?

 

[Velenora]

If you get these pants with a bottomless pit for a pocket, then you only need one. It's only selling for a limited time only so call 1800-OMG-POCKET before they run out. Disclaimer: We're not responsible if you lose your belongings forever in the bottomless pit.

Why is cake so delicious?

 

[srebro]

To your taste buds cake is the equivalent of what cocaine is to a crack head. Essentially you will inevitably turn into a cake yourself and the same terrible fate will fall onto the next person and the next.

Tell us why if wrong is right then right is wrong

 

[Leggy]

Wron Gisr Ight and Righ Tisw Rong were an unusual Siamese twin act from the early 30's. They were unusual because they were the only Siamese twins who weren't actually related. Wron was from Philadelphia, and Righ was from Texas.

If you jump for joy, how high do you jump?

 

[srebro]

You don't jump so high, joy is at the height of all bunnies.
You just hop for joy like a little cute rabbit and you'll get to where you want to be

If you walk forward then why is the world all backwards?

 

[Leggy]

Your feet are the wrong way, they should be facing backwards. That way, when you are walking forward, you would be moving backwards, like everybody else.

Who is the little star named Twinkle Twinkle, that everybody talks about?

 

[srebro]

Because they sparkle like my eyes when they set upon cute things.

Aside from that the colour of glitter is yellow which is the same as your pee pee. When you go pee pee you go twinkle.

Hence why Twinkle Twinkle.

Why are cheeks so soft and squishy :3

 

[Leggy]

Makes it easier to swallow light bulbs whole.

Why didn't the early cavemen invent nuclear reactors?

 

[srebro]

Because they still had daisies in their hair, got drunk everyday and danced around like hippies before the dinosaurs came and ate them. Sadly nuclear reactors never kicked off.

Why are pandas so yin and yang

 

[Leggy]

No no, not yin and yang... the most famous pandas are Hei Bai, the spirit panda from Avatar: the Last Airbender, and of course, Po, the Dragon Warrior!


Who is the demon of bad grades?

 

[srebro]

The demon is I, I just got my ass wooped by Sensei!

By the way where is here and there?

 

[Leggy]

Here and there.

Who is the King of Kong?

 

[srebro]

The King of Kong is the one with a pocket full of quarters and a pocket full of pride.

Then again the Kong has his heart stolen by a harlot, so you could probably be Kong's master instead if you just flash your panties.

Do wishes really come true if you wish upon a star

 

[Leggy]

I've been wishing for years on Scarlett Johanssen, and it hasn't done me a bit of good.


Who is the best Teletubby?

 

[srebro]

The Black one, but Russians is always best choice

What time does the big bad wolf come out to play?

 

[Leggy]

The strip club opens at 6.

Legos or Lincoln Logs?

 

[srebro]

Legos they make for better houses to live in.

Why Robots they must always be in disguise?

 

[Leggy]

What??? Did some of my paint scrape off?
Error... error... error... warning, Will Robinson!


Why does the sun rise in the East?

 

[srebro]

Don't be silly your eyes are telling you lies, the Sun doesn't actually rise from any direction.
It actually rises and expands in size like a pancake for breakfast.

Why is life like a hermit crab?

 

[Leggy]

For the shell of it.


If a woodchuck could chuck wood, how much cotton could a rabbit pick?

 

[srebro]

Isn't it obvious?

As many wood a woodchuck could chuck if Chuck would chuck woodchuckers with woodchuck wood and woodchucks that would actually chuck woodchuck wood at Chuck.

With American history and the rabbits, they are just an adorable distraction between the real war going on with the wood chuckers.

Why people must insist on singing in the rain?

 

[Leggy]

Because farting in the rain isn't as poetic.

How do you save time?

 

[srebro]

Hold it's hands and never let it go!

So if we held hands now would the world come to an end?

 

[Leggy]

Holding hands from different parts of the world would be a miracle!
Unless... one of us is a mutant teleporter...


Why doesn't the Sun revolve around the Earth?